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How many of you have ever been told that you look or act just like your mother? That may cause some to cringe, while others may receive it as a compliment! I have heard my husband counseling young men with this statement, “If you want to know what that little sweetie will be like in 30 years, just look at her mother!” While that is not always entirely true, it is truer in most instances than some would like to believe, especially at that young age. 

As Mother’s Day approaches, many are posting pictures and comments about their mother. Some are making comparisons of pictures of themselves now, side by side, with a picture of their mother at about the same age. The resemblance is almost breathtaking. With some, you could almost ask which one is the mother and which is the daughter. Others are posting actions that a mother took, or statements she would make while raising the children, and commenting how they find themselves doing or saying the very same things.

Every mother is a mentor, for good or for bad. Just this week, I was at a place of business, and a mother and young girl were getting into a car. Instead of opening the back door of the vehicle to get in, the girl opened the driver’s side front door, while the mom was getting into the passenger’s side. What I heard next broke my heart. The mother immediately started yelling at the daughter to shut the door, and using such profanity that even I was shocked. The young girl, about 10 years of age, embarrassed, dropped her head, immediately obeyed and got into the back seat of the vehicle. My thoughts went three ways. I immediately felt pity for the young child, wondering what kind of life she was enduring behind closed doors in the home. My mind also went to the mother. How was she treated as a child? Was she yelled and cursed at? Was there intolerance in her home life? Was kindness ever exhibited? In my opinion, that little girl would have shut the front door and gotten in the back seat with a simple, “Honey, please close the door and get in the back seat.” In my moment of observation, this child was given three lessons by example. She was taught to show disrespect to another person in a public place, to yell to get an action that you want and to use profanity. How sad! I am and will be forever grateful that I was not raised in an environment like that! My third thought was what are my actions, reactions and words teaching those who are watching me?  

Titus chapter 2 has instructions for mentoring. [3] “The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; [4] That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, [5] To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” These are not suggestions for us, but directives. There are others watching not only how we act, but what we say. They are learning from us even when we do not know that we are being observed. This is especially magnified in the home where life can be the most chaotic. We are constantly being observed by young eyes that are watching us as mothers in the good times and bad! We want those who are following us to find us faithful, being a good example to follow!  

Everyone seems to have a role model, or someone you look up to, a mentor of sorts. This is someone who inspires you! That is usually an older person, maybe your mother, one who has had life experiences and you are drawn to them by the path they have taken. To learn and grow, when the path you are taking is questioned by someone who cares so much about your well-being, don’t tune out the older voice. Many times it is the voice of reason. God often uses a mother’s wisdom, or the wisdom of a Godly mentor to direct you into a path of His will for your life.  

This Mother’s Day, I thank God for my mother and for every other Godly mentor that He has placed in my life!  
Submitted by
Ruth Nichols

Sis. Ruth Nichols, wife of Conference President Rev. Don Nichols, has been a Pastor's wife for 41 years, and has a true heart for those in Ministry.  You will love her insights as she draws from her many years in pastoral work.  
She is the mother of 3 children, and is also a registered nurse.

           A MOTHER - A MENTOR